Uncle Phil
by 1arigato
Summary: Phil Coulson has a nephew. And his name is Samuel Witwicky.
1. Phil

Uncle Phil

Summary: Phil Coulson has a nephew. And his name is Samuel Witwicky.

An Avengers x Transformers Crossover

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Phil Coulson was an agent.

He always found good recruits, trained the best agents, and would have been Director Fury's right hand man if he didn't turn down the position (it wasn't his kind of thing, anyway, and everyone seemed to agree. Agent Barton and Romanoff claimed it would have been weird seeing him not walking around facilities or helping out agents on the field). Besides, Agent Hill appeared eligable for the position, and was already proving herself quickly as she got promotion after promotion.

Fortunately (or unfortunately) Phil Coulson was also an uncle.

There was the oldest brother, Robby, the only sister, Judy, and the second oldest brother, Brett. Phil was the youngest of the four, but there wasn't much difference in behaviour between them, though Phil liked to think of himself as the less wierd one. Director Fury caught him in a phone conference with his three siblings, and least to say, they agreed they wouldn't speak of it again.

"–on't think you can really send doughnuts where I am right now, so stop asking, Brett! Yes, well, just because I sit behind a desk for Homeland Security doesn't mean that we only live on coffee; I eat food, you know—_Judy_! Don't threaten your second youngest brother with a baseball bat! You can't even threaten someone over the phone since you're not there! Robby, I _said_, you can't even threaten—for goodness sake, get yourself a hearing aid soon, or stop working for demolition!" Unwilling to hear more, the youngest Coulson hung up on his siblings.

When Fury heard his usually composed agent mutter "…_wonder who's really the older sibling_…" the tall man laughed. Just because they agreed never to mention it again didn't mean the director couldn't laugh about it, and when he'd randomly crack up, Romanoff and Barton would lift a brow at the Coulson, to which the perfect agent's calm mask would crack.

Sometimes, Phil had to remind himself that society didn't take strangling siblings too nicely.

The up side to having older siblings was Sam. Samuel James Witwicky, the only child of Phil's sister, was intriguing. Robby and Brett never bothered to find a girl and get married, but Phil felt that no niece or nephew could compare to what was Sam. The boy seemed to inherit more from his father—natural humor and wit—but Phil caught the kid's fingers twitch when he faced the same annoyance that would make Judy reach for a bat and _swing_. Luckily, there was nothing around that the boy reached for, but the SHIELD agent reminded himself that Judy stuck Sam into Krav Maga lessons when he was still young. Phil also reminded himself to take a note in his phone that Sam would make one heck of a SHIELD agent.

(Considering the Krav Maga coupled with the negotiating skills Phil witnessed his nephew use to escape trouble, the Coulson then understood why his boss cackled for hours when he brought in Recruit Barton and when the archer brought in Romanoff. Several Coulson reunions found Phil looking over his shoulder whenever he was on a work call despite being out the house where no one could easily hear him, and the uncle got the notion Sam was a freaking ninja despite the young age, and that the kid suspected he worked for black ops or something.)

One year, Phil was nearly late to a Coulson family reunion. After Stark caused mass media chaos, the SHIELD agent was forced to abandon the plans that made the cover story believable, and get to work straightening things out. He spent nearly a week putting up with Tony's annoyances and making sure SHIELD wouldn't pop up in Iron Man's story, and by the time he started his car for the family reunion, he didn't have the energy to feel surprised when he read his latest message from Fury. _Loose satellites crashed in Tranquility…a failed terrorist attack on Mission city…government took care of both._ Phil frowned. If the director sent this to him, it meant that SHIELD wasn't notified that the "government took care of both." The President seemed quiet on the matter, but Fury must have been irked that another division was tasked with the terrorist attack; Phil didn't mean to brag, but SHIELD was the country's best division to deal with these kind of things. The man put his thoughts on the back burner when the host house came up, and he quickly parked before entering, apologising for his almost tardiness.

Phil immediately wished Stark wasn't so problematic to have eaten up his week and thus prevent him from digging up more on the satellite and terrorist events. Whenever asked of his opinion on the satellites, Phil's nephew Sam would dodge the direct query and feed a reply that led his relatives to believe he wasn't interested, but Judy and her husband would keep adding to each other's sentences so that they could get off the topic quick, but instead making their situation worse. Sam butt in with something about muffins before pulling his parents to the kitchen, and Phil reread Fury's message to get more of what he could on the satellite story. When Judy and Ron reappeared and turned the point of conversation towards cooking—something Brett couldn't deny (really, who becomes a policeman for the doughnuts?)—Phil came into the kitchen and innocently filled himself a glass of water.

"You feeling alright, kid? You've seemed a bit off lately." Sam shrugged. "What do you think of the satellites, Uncle Phil?" Phil stiffened a moment, recalling that he'd made a few enemies working for SHIELD and that Judy's home was in Tranquility. He'd done well keeping his profile with his relatives seemingly unconnected, but if someone somehow found out and tried attacking Tranquility in hopes of revenge…. Phil needed to contact Director Fury once the reunion was over for more info on the "satellite crashing." At the moment, Phil simply gave his trademark, unreadable smile and replied, "I wish I knew if those were really satellites."

The year SHIELD discovered Captain America in the ice, Phil found it hard to push himself to the Coulson reunion. Things were normal there, with the only exception taking form of Sam's girlfriend. Phil wanted to knuckle punch his nephew in landing with such a girl, and the feeling grew when he noticed that the Banes girl loved Sam just as much as the kid loved her. They looked like a good couple, their relationship very sweet, and Phil was reminded of the cellist he was currently dating back near SHEILD base. Something pulled on Phil's gut despite the atmosphere staying homey and welcome, when the agent suddenly realised that his sister and her spouse hadn't spoken a word about Sam going to college. Everyone got the flood of email alerts from Judy as she went teary-eyed through family album pictures of her baby, and Phil was forced to get technicians department to install another number on his cell so that work could be separated from home. Barton, with his sensitive hearing, threatened to shoot explosive arrows at Phil's constantly buzzing cell regardless the device was on Phil's person or not.

It appeared Sam was in the centre of the Witwickys' lack of personal talk, and Phil planned to find out what event was shadowing his sister's family that especially seemed to affect Sam; the uncle pulled the kid aside when everyone was occupied to talk. "Sam, you know you can tell me anything." Eyes shifting from green and blue met Phil's baby blue ones in hesitation. "I know," was the simple answer. Phil watched his nephew take a breath before lowering his voice. After hearing that Sam's school was the target of a terrorist attack, Phil found himself thinking back on the satellites incident just two years before. In cases such as Stark and Thor's, Phil supposed hiding the identity of all SHIELD operatives on the field would be harder than usual since things like flying combat suits and thunder demigods couldn't easily be hidden from nosy media. Sam and his family's whereabouts seemed to be in the middle of something out of SHIELD's reach on the years Phil was working with potential candidates for the Avengers Initiative.

The more Phil worked on something pretty public, the more the Witwicky family was uncomfortably near something big. Without asking for more, Phil finished his talk with Sam and returned to the living room where the adults conversed, and later that day, Phil turned down Fury's offer to help Captain America settle in modern day life. At the surprised response, Phil texted he'd explain later.

More than a year later, Phil didn't plan to die before making sure his relatives were safe.

…Which was why it was a good thing Loki barely missed his vitals and the medics at a SHIELD base in Illinois detected Phil's still beating heart and brought him out of his coma. Three days into his waking, Chicago and New York were under alien attack—neither alien parties planned it and weren't even aware of each other, but the timing couldn't have been more terrible—so Phil put together a response team from the Illinois base and headed to Chicago. With the learning that the entire US government was working together on the Chicago attack and the Avengers and local police on New York, Phil knew the aliens didn't stand a chance. He just didn't expect to see his nephew helping lead the attack on the enemy. With an assault rifle. And the Camaro he owned fighting alongside him.

"Uncle Phil?" "Sam?" "How are you here?" "My parents had se—" "That's not what I meant." Little brat. Phil couldn't help but allow the quirk of his lips, though.

After the battle, Phil ran into the Camaro alien, Bumblebee, and after the yellow bot connected optics with his leader for a moment, Sam's car seemed to accept him and simply told Phil to ask his nephew about Giza through a text (apparently Bumblebee's vocal processors were damaged in an older battle, but Phil wasn't used to the radio-talk used, so the robot texted Phil through the man's number the Camaro alien hacked from a database somewhere. No wonder SHIELD didn't know of these alien robots before; their technological prowess was out of this world—excuse the pun). The leader, Optimus Prime, asked to talked to Phil in a more reserved place, and the agent soon discovered why. There was a lot of explaining and terms that probably would have those NEST people marching for Sam in demand for _how the heck he is a human Prime_. Phil couldn't really grasp everything yet, so he decided he'd ask Sam when he'd find his nephew.

Fury's phone call reminded Phil of his imagined mental images on NEST fussing over Sam. The director started barking about how much trouble Phil's apparently false death caused, about how there was no one to prevent the Avengers from arguing with each other, and—how Phil did a _job well done_. With the informing that the Avengers bonded under his "death" and saved Manhatten, Phil told him to pass on his congrats, and the uncle turned to his nephew. "I heard something about human Prime?" The conversation began at that, and Phil learned what he could from what Sam told him. The agent couldn't help but stop the Witwicky when the kid said something Phil wasn't sure he heard correctly. "Hold on–'destroys?' 'Give life?'" Goodness, Phil knew the big guy (Optimus) could destroy, but did this Prime thing mean his nephew could bring back the dead? Could bring back _zombies_? Sam just laughed. "There's a lot of catching up to do, uncle, and hopefully you can explain some stuff too–_are those Captain America cards?_" "Signed by the man himself." It was a good thing Steve signed them before the deck was shipped along with Phil when he was moved to Illinois; the expression on Sam's face was priceless. "I may have underestimated how much _catching up_ we have to do," the kid said, and it was Phil's turn to laugh.


	2. Sam

Uncle Phil

Summary: Phil Coulson has a nephew. And his name is Samuel Witwicky.

An Avengers x Transformers Crossover

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Judy Witwicky was from a family of many. The red-haired woman had an older brother and two younger brothers; all were insane, at least in Sam's opinion. Uncle Robby went into the demolition business because he liked explosions, Uncle Brett joined the police force because he liked doughnuts (huh), and Uncle Phil was (over) obssessed over Captain America. Considering the fact that Judy came out of that childhood with only a baseball bat that never left her side, she turned out kind of normal.

Ron Witwicky would always joke how his wife's brothers were "unique" during Coulson family reunions, but Sam liked to think that his Uncle Phil was not so much as odd as _mysterious_. In family reunions, Uncle Brett kept offering everyone doughnuts, and Uncle Robby would keep shouting _What!_ due to his hearing. Uncle Phil? He'd politely keep conversation with the newer faces in the reunion–this cousin's new wife, an aunt who's been traveling–all while subtly keeping a hand near his side, as if ready to whip out his cell. Or maybe a gun.

When Uncle Phil's cell did ring, he would excuse himself and go outside for a private conversation over the phone, though when Sam went into stealth mode, he would pick up words like "_director_…_division_…_affirmed_…_agent_…" as he stood just close enough to the kitchen window. Uncle Phil claimed he worked for Homeland Security. Sam thought black ops.

On the family reunion the year Sam killed Megatron with the All Spark, things were more awkward. While he smoothly dodged inquiries of his opinion on the "loose satellites" that crashed in the US like an uninterested teen, his parents were more jumpy and more suspicious, and while his uncles' actions didn't always make sense, they were still quite intelligent. Uncle Brett would sometimes hit too close to home when he asked questions like an officer grilling a prisoner, while Uncle Robby–despite his terrible hearing–would easily note facial movements as someone spoke and one's body language. Uncle Robby's eyes would keep narrowing as Sam's parents kept talking, when finally the young Witwicky almost rudely pulled his parents out of the conversation to try grandma's muffins despite having ate them every reunion.

When Uncle Phil swept by and asked Sam if he was alright, the brunette simply asked what his uncle thought of the satellites. Uncle Phil stiffened a little and gave his unreadable smile that looked polite and proffessional. "I wish I knew if those were really satellites," he simply said, and as the Witwicky family drove home after, Sam would wonder if his uncle smiled the same smile at people he worked with. The only consolation Sam got from the reunion was that none of his uncles knew that those satellites were actually alien robots and that the terrorist attack on Mission City wasn't made by Earthly terrorists.

The family reunion the year of…_Egypt_ was less ackward as quite. At least, on the Witwicky family's part. Sam brought Mikaela, the love of his life he was sure he was going to marry (years later he would watch as she walked away, but that was irrelevant for now), and the presence of the stunning young woman who was quite knowledgeable in car engines loosened the atmosphere around his close relatives. Ron and Judy still acted like they usually did in Coulson reunions, making jokes over wine and sharing tips on gardening (Judy) and paths (Ron), but there was less talk of personal life from them, and while everyone didn't notice, Sam was pretty sure Uncle Phil stood suspicious of something. More than once he caught said Coulson's eyes on him whenever Sam saw his reflection on a glass of water or on the windows.

As Mikaela chatted with Uncle Robby and Uncle Brett about car tires and Sam's parents were talking about outdoor home decor, Uncle Phil pulled Sam aside. Sam found his Uncle Phil to be his favorite uncle, and Sam had a good idea Uncle Phil favoured him too. While most couldn't read _the_ Phillip Coulson easily, Sam could almost sense his uncle's emotions, and it was the same vice versa. It was because of that connection the two had that Sam understood his uncle was concerned as he pulled him aside. "Sam," the man reminded, "you know you can tell me anything." Sam took a breath–_You're a soldier now!_…_I smell your fear, boy!_…_You were dead for 4.836 minutes_–"I know," he assured. "Uncle Phil," Sam lowered his voice, and Uncle Phil leaned in, "recently there was a terrorist attack on my school." "Harvard," Uncle Phil confirmed. "Yes. Mom, as you'd predict, reacted extremely, and Dad supported all her decisions. I'm only still attending this college because I managed to convince them over lasagna." It was a Witwicky favorite, especially Judy's, and her brother nodded at that. The supposedly Homeland Security member didn't ask for anything more, something to which Sam stood surprised, and the young Coulson went back to join the adults chattering. Sam returned to Mikaela's side, and when she sent a questioning look, he shook his head, and she relaxed.

Uncle Phil took that cover story.

But the next incident was _impossible_ to create a cover story for.

This time, Sam didn't see his favorite uncle again in a Coulson reunion–it was in battle. Sam and Epps drove in with their trusted allies–some from the Marines, others from Air Force–and a majority of NEST was there like the family they were (working with sentient cars and taking down 'Cons actually created quite strong bonds). The rest of NEST was either stationed at communications with Simmons and Mearing, or following Sam and Epps into Chicago with Will. All kinds of US government were gathering together to work on the disaster that the 'Cons were making of Chicago, and the presence of Cybertonians was forciably revealed to all of US government, unlike the above level 7 secrecy they originally had. After saving Carley with help of the Autobots (Sam would _never __**ever**_ betray them again) the Witwicky directed his girlfriend to safer territory when they were forcibly separated.

Joining Epps and Will in the fight, Sam did what he could–downing a few 'Cons, locating the pillars, informing of 'Con fighting habits to his newer teammates–and it lasted for a good half hour before the brunette ran into SHIELD members, or more specifically _Agent_ Phil Coulson. "Uncle Phil?" "Sam?" Both parties were equally shocked in finding the other there. The SHIELD agent spotted an AR15 in his nephew's hands while the human Prime noted that his uncle seemed to be leader in the group of Men in Black wannabees. "How are you here?" Uncle Phil asked while signalling his team to support the mix of Air Force, Marines, and NEST that made up Sam's group. "Uhh, my parents had se–" "That's not what I meant," the agent cut in, but his eyes were twinkling in laughter. Sam sighed. "My first car turned out to be a super-advanced alien robot." "What!" "You're sounding like Uncle Robby, uncle." "I–" Uncle Phil suddenly turned and took out a 'Con's eye with a CZ 100 from his jacket, before returning to the topic on hand, "Why wasn't I informed?" Sam rolled his eyes, before copying his uncle and spraying bullets at the cockpit of a gun ship; the aircraft crashed as a 'Con stumbled out, to which Topspin quickly disposed of. "Then explain why Homeland Security is at the site of a war right now." "Touchè."

After the battle, Uncle Phil's phone rings, and a voice like a commander's barks through the speakers. The Coulson states something about not knowing he wasn't going to die either and giving his congratulations to the Avengers, before he turns to his nephew, who is of course trying not to make eye contact. "I heard something about human Prime?" Sam turns, bewildered, before shushing his uncle. "Who…?" "The big guy told me. Optimus Prime, I believe?" Sam let out a breath in relief. "Only a few know. Not even Wil–err, Major Lennox and Master Sergeant Epps." "What do Judy and Ron think?" Sam's cheeks coloured a little. "They don't know either, but it's safer this way. I can't really defend myself as Prime, much less my parents. Optimus is the one who destroys to protect, and I give life to protect." Phil raised his hands. "Hold on–'destroys?' 'Give life?'" Sam laughed and patted his uncle's back. "There's a lot of catching up to do, uncle, and hopefully you can explain some stuff too–_are those Captain America cards?_"

As the pair walk down the rubbled streets of Chicago, sharing what they previously couldn't tell, Sam idly wonders how his uncle would react if he knew it wasn't the first time Sam stood in a war zone. And then he wonders how his uncle would react if he found out about Egypt. "So, I heard about you not dying?" Sam inquries. "I thought I would, but apparently my vitals were missed. Your Camero also told me to ask you about Giza." Giza. As in _Giza, Egypt_. Sam appreciated that Optimus had much trust in his uncle when the Autobot sensed Sam's father-son feelings with Uncle Phil over the bond, but he couldn't help but get irritated with the irony of his thoughts and his uncle's queries. Sam sent his brotherly annoyance through his bond to Optimus, and the older Prime replied with amusement.

"Giza? It's sandy, hot, and–umm–idiedthere." "…_What!_" "Seriously, Uncle Phil, you're sounding like Uncle Robby."


End file.
